I'm sure the people at PETA are a generally well-intentioned, passionate bunch, but their energies often seem completely wasted on misguided marketing efforts. Exhibit A: Save the Sea Kittens, a movement intended to inspire people to stop the "hunting" and eating of fish by re-naming them "Sea-Kittens."

Seriously?

The whole idea behind the campaign seems to be that people who regularly chow down on delicacies from the deep might think twice before eating a Sea Kitten. An admirable cause, but I can't help thinking they're going about it the wrong way. Case in point: the movement's own microsite contains the following copy:

"People don't seem to like fish. They're slithery and slimy, and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird, to say the least. Plus, the small ones nibble at your feet when you're swimming, and the big ones—well, the big ones will bite your face off if Jaws is anything to go by."

O-kay. What I'm getting from the above copy is that PETA wants me to feel sympathetic toward a bunch of ugly, intrusive, generally lethal mouth-breathers who would devour me at the first opportunity? Now, I'm not a particularly big fan of fish, but if I were, I doubt this argument would make me drop the drawn butter and lemon and hunt up a soy burger.

—Tom